


Hetalia Random One-shots

by BlueEyedArcher



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Brothers, Friendship/Love, Historical References, Love, Male Friendship, One Shot Collection, Past Violence, Sad, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-13
Updated: 2014-03-13
Packaged: 2018-01-15 13:48:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 7,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1307059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueEyedArcher/pseuds/BlueEyedArcher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a collection of random Hetalia one-shots with various characters. May include yaoi (boy x boy) in some but not all. Some include the bond between brothers and friends. Others are history coming back and war plaguing their lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Forgive But Never Forget

      He looked into the Americans sad blue eyes as he tried to figure out what he could possibly say next. His past was dark and his mistakes were too many to count. Heartbreak was the evidence against him, riddled with guilt and drenched in so many lonely tears. The Russian sighed as the American reached across the bed to wrap his finger's around his hands "What is it Ivan? What's wrong?"

  
    The Russian wanted to smile, to reassure his partner but found he couldn't fake it. Not today. He wasn't going to lie to the american and he wasn't going to keep anything from him. His violet eyes took in the American's appearance. He wore his usual, a plain t-shirt, white. Over it was a red hoodie that was unzipped and he had on faded blue jeans. 'He's so cute when he dresses like a civilian.' His thoughts made him want to smile but he couldn't force his mouth to move into such a position.  
    "Alfred?" Tears brimmed his eyes, fighting to be released but he held them back.

  
    Alfred looked up into Ivan's gaze "Yes?"

  
    Ivan hesitated before speaking, pondering what his words will mean to Alfred when he utters them. After a few seconds he sighed and looked into his brilliant ocean blue eyes. They held so much emotion. They were like a pool of water, crystal clear and beautiful. Giving anyone who cares to give a glance the ability to see everything. Perfect mirrors to an innocent soul. "Do you.....do you think God could forgive me for what I've done?" He swallowed hard.

  
Alfred held Ivan's hand, his thoughts dancing in his eyes before he answered "I can't answer that. I don't know what he'd think."

  
Ivan felt a tightness in his chest "Oh....." His expression fell into a deeper depression "Then, can you answer me this? Do...do you think you could possibly forgive me?"

  
    Alfred gave a slight smile "Yes."

  
    Alfred leaned in close, resting his forehead against Ivan's.

  
    Ivan closed his eyes "Why? What is your reason?"

  
    Alfred closed his eyes and whispered "Because i love you-"

  
    Ivan watched Alfred speak and took the chance to use his mouth to tease Alfred's lips apart with his own, pressing gently against his. Alfred was shocked by the action but went along, wrapping his arms around Ivan's neck and curling his fingers up into his soft hair. Ivan grabbed Alfred by the waist as they broke apart for a breathe then pulled him up onto his lap, bringing their lips back together. Breaking apart only long enough for them to breath each other's names and an "I love you." The tears in Ivan's eyes flowed over, pouring down his cheeks as the cold tightness in his chest was melted away by Alfred's warmth. They pulled each other closer until their wasn't room for air to pass between them and then pressed against each other harder.

  
    Alfred stopped, feeling Ivan's tears trickling passed his face "What's wrong?"

  
    Ivan smiled "Nothing. I realized, this is the first time I've been truly happy."

  
    Alfred smiled "Don't worry. Tonight, I'm gonna make you the happiest man alive."

  
    Ivan smiled, a truly real smile of joy "I'll keep you to that promise."


	2. A Past Reminder of The Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 72 years after the first massacres of Germany's genocide campaign, a man recognizes Germany and attacks him. Prussia comes home to see the aftermath.

  
  
_Date: June 25, 2012_

  
Prussia walked into their house, feeling something off immediately. He looked around inspecting the premises but found nothing odd and so he continue into the rest of the house. Glancing around as he moved from room to room, ending up in the kitchen. He froze where he stood, staring at drops of red on the floor. He lifted his gaze to crimson hand prints on the wall leading towards the stairs and up to Germany's room. Without another thought he tried to open the door but it was locked. Stepping back he sent his steel toed boot slamming into the wood near the handle. It bowed under the pressure, loosening the frame, allowing the door to swing open to a shocking sight. Germany was laying in a pool of his own blood, the words "It wasn't my fault." written in red on the wall above his body. "Oh god! Bruder?! Bruder?!" He called as he kneeled next to his bruder's motionless body.

  
He checked for vitals signs finding a faint heartbeat and shallow breathing before pulling out his phone and calling 911. Inspecting his bruder's body, he found a very deep very large wound going longways across his abdomant. Blood drenched his clothes.

  
Prussia held his hand, while pulling off his jacket to cover the wound. "Come on West. Stay with me."

  
Germany looked up at his bruder, eyes foggy and glazed "It wasn't my fault......."

  
Prussia asked "What wasn't your fault?"

  
Germany seemed not to hear him as he continued "He said.......my fault....the past is red and my hands.....are stained.....with lost...innocence....to..day...is the past....Bruder.....it wasn't....my...fault..." His eyes rolled back in his head as he passed out.

  
Prussia thought for a moment 'Today is the day. A little over 70 years since it began. The murders. The massacres. The loss of so many lives. West, you're right. It wasn't your fault.'

  
The wail of the sirens came in the distance.

  
As the paramedics took his bruder away to the hospital, Prussia made a few calls while driving behind the ambulance. He called one of the officers that was working with his bruder earlier that day. It rang twice before someone answered.

  
"Hello?"

  
"Hello. I want to speak with the officer working with Commander Germany today." Prussia demanded in a calm tone.

  
"You're speaking to him. Who is this?" the voice was quiet and worried.

  
"This is Officer Prussia. I wanted to know if anything strange happened today during patrols?"

  
The voice wavered "Sir? How do you know that?"

  
Prussia demanded "Know what? Tell me what happened during patrols."

  
The male on the other end of the phone stuttered "Ye-yes sir. We were following the usual course set when a man started yelling at the Commander. When Commander Germany tried to calm the man down he attacked us."

  
Prussia's heart hammered in his head "What was the man yelling about?"

  
The voice hesitated then answered "He yelled "It's your fault. It's your fault. Then something about blood on someone's hands and then he took off.Commander Germany sent me back to my post to file a report before he headed off after the man. I haven't seen him since. Sir, why are you asking?"

  
Prussia's heart beat faster, his mind racing. He spoke quickly "It's nothing. Thanks." Then hung up.

  
Prussia growled out loud "So someone knew about West and his involvement and wanted revenge. Not many survived those days and ended up here and even less knew about us. Who the hell did this to my little bruder?"  
  



	3. Fem Italy's Lunar Cycle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fem Italy sends Germany on an embarrassing errand which Germany tricks his older brother Prussia into doing.

Italy woke up with a refreshing yawn as she stretched out on the bed. Quietly she rose from her comfortable position and walked into the bathroom as she heard Germany call from the kitchen "Italy! Breakfast is ready!"

  
She hollered back "Be there in a minute!" before washing her face at the sink. She looked into the mirror and smiled, fluttering her wet eyelashes before grabbing for a hand towel to dry off. Suddenly she felt something weird and her face turned red as a embarrassing thought crossed her mind.

 

  
  
Germany sat down sipping a cup of freshly made coffee as he began to read the newspaper. He heard Italy's light footsteps pad down the hallway behind him. When they came to the doorway, he didn't look up as he took a sip of his coffee "Good morning Italy!"  When she didn't say it back as she walked passed him nervously, he looked up with a bit of concern. _'She always says good morning and she never walks into the kitchen without hugging me. Something's off with her.'_ He thought to himself. 'Did i do something wrong?' He looked back over the past few days and found he did nothing out of the usual. He folded up his paper and sat down his coffee as he rose to his feet and walked over to where Italy was pouring a cup of orange juice.

  
He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder and asked "Hey, is something the matter?"

  
Italy tensed slightly then relaxed but remained nervous and fidgety "Um....no...nothing is wrong baby." she replied.

  
Germany gave a gentle smile "You know you can tell me anything, right? What's the matter?"

  
Italy sat the orange juice down and began twiddling her fingers "Umm....okay..don't be mad okay."

  
Germany was even more concerned by the fact that Italy thought what she had to say would anger him "Okay. Tell me. I'm not going to be mad."

  
Italy mumbled her words under her breath before turning a bright red.

  
Germany, confused by her strange behavior asked "I'm sorry, could you say that a bit louder? I couldn't hear you."

  
Italy took a breath and said "Come here."

  
Germany moved closer as Italy leaned in to whisper into his ear "Can you go to the store and get me some tampons?"

  
Italy's face was crimson when she leaned back. When Germany finally registered her words, his face quickly became 5 different shades of red, each one darker than the last before he asked "WHAT?"

  
Italy's eyes brimmed with tears from embarrassment as she cried "I knew you'd be mad."

  
Germany wrapped his arms around her and held her close "I'm....not mad....i'm just.......surprised is all." He voice betrayed his calm facade as it wavered.  
Italy hugged Germany back "So will you do it?"

  
Germany nodded. His thoughts running through his mind 'What the hell am i gonna do? I don't know about female products. Where the hell am i going to find them?'

 

  
  
After breakfast he held a list of stuff he would need in his hand as he left the house to go shopping. On the way to the store he picked up his bruder Prussia to go along for the ride. When they arrived in the store, they stood in the feminine hygiene aisle for 20 minutes looking at the products and clueless as to what to get. Both red faced and confused. When they noticed a female clerk, Germany nudged his brother in the ribs "Go ask her for help."

  
Prussia's face turned red as he snapped "No. You do it. This is for your damn girlfriend."

  
Germany remembered how bad he was with people because he comes off as intimidating and scary so he used a trick "Please bro? I'll do anything you want me to do, just go ask her for help."

  
Prussia thought about it then replied "Fine, what i want you to do is go ask her yourself!"

  
Germany hung his head "But i thought The Awesome Prussia could do anything? I thought he'd be awesome enough not to be embarrassed about talking to a girl and asking her a question." He looked sad and let down.

  
Prussia fell for Germany's guilt trick and laughed "Well i am awesome. Fine bruder. But you'll owe me big after this."

  
Germany knew what that meant "Fine i'll go out drinking and clubbing with you Friday, just please do this for me first."

  
Prussia swallowed his pride and walked up to the clerk and asked her for help. Germany watched from afar as he saw the girl giggle and Prussia turn a deep red then ask him a few questions herself as they returned to the tampon section. Germany heard her ask "Do you know how heavy her period is?"

  
Prussia shook his head, a look of shock on his face as the girl giggled again "That's going to be a problem. Here try these for now." She handed his a few small boxes and smiled "Do you need anything else?"

  
Prussia shook his head mumbling "Thanks." as she left.

  
Germany walked up behind his bruder and placed a hand on his shoulder while taking the boxes and placing them in the basket "You are a good soldier, taking one for the team. You shall have your leave....after you go through the check-out with these."

  
Prussia looked at his little bruder "You owe me more than just one Friday night dude. That was un-awesome." He hung his head as they walked to the check-out area.  
  



	4. Beyond Hunger and Pleasure

The brit walked down the street in the early darkness of night. The streets were clouded in fog as he walked home after a long hard days work. He stopped in his tracks as he watched a young man about his age with long blond hair and blue eyes stumble away from an older gentleman. The young man spit onto the ground and coughed, wiping his mouth with a hankerchief, a look of disgust and sadness crept like a shadow upon his face. It stayed there as the older gentleman fiddled with his belt on his pants and walked away. The brit recognized this youth as a poor homeless kid that wandered the streets doing any kind of favor in return for pocket change. He would do anything because that desperation decided his survival on these unforgiving damp dark streets.  
  
    The brit was disgusted by how easily manipulated and used the kid was. Doing ungodly deeds just to get enough change so he can buy table scraps as his next meal. The youth shivered in the damp air and slunk down to sit on the ground as if to make it a residence for the night. His clothes were worn and dirty and his body was skinny and malnourished. He looked almost sickly from the lack of food and worn out from the constant unrelenting cold rainy weather battering him daily.  
  
    The brit sighed and approached the young man who's ocean blue eyes gazed up into his emerald ones "Yes sir? Can i help you?"  
  
    The brit nodded "Yes. I think you can. You want money and i have a request." He took note of the youth's french accent thinking it was kind of cute.  
  
    The young man tensed up at the thought of repeating what he had just done. It disgusted him but he needed the money "What is your request sir?"  
  
    The brit held out his hand "Come with me. I have a more suitable place to go for such events."   
  
    The young man took it and rose from the ground. Looking around before following the brit. The brit asked "What is your name?"  
  
    The french man replied "Francis. Francis Bonnefoy sir."  
  
    The brit smiled "Nice to meet you. Mine is Arthur Kirkland."  
  
    It didn't take long before they came to a huge manor. It was a victorian mansion, not very old by the looks. They entered the huge wooden doors and stopped just inside the entryway. Arthur continued, hanging up his jacket and removing his vest and tie as Francis gawked at the enormity of the house. Arthur turned and laughed to himself at the cute awed look that floated on Francis's face as he observed the place "You may enter my home, Francis. You need not be so shy."  
  
    Francis closed his mouth and shook his head then muttered "Yes sir." quickly while removing his jacket and shoes like Arthur had done.  
  
    Arthur led the young man up the the stairs to his room and smiled "You may take a bath if you like before i tell you my request. I can wait."  
  
    Francis nodded "Thank you but i have no other clothes sir."  
  
    Arthur smiled "You're about my size so you can have some of my clothes."  
  
    Francis took a nice long hot bath and pulled on some of Arthur's clothes. He walked out of the bathroom trying to dry his hair and ended up bumping into Arthur "Sorry sir." He looked up from under the towel. Arthur smiled at his cute expression. His blue eyes shining from behind a halo of long golden locks. Arthur had Francis sit down as he  took the towel and helped dry his hair. Francis asked curiosly "So, what is your request sir?"  
  
    Francis looked up just as Arthur leaned down and pressed his lips against the frenchman's. Francis closed his eyes absorbing the feeling of Arthur's body as it moved closer to his. He wasn't forceful like all the other's. He was gentle and considerate. Arthur felt a strong pull towards Francis. He pulled back looking up into those blue eyes "My request is that you stay here with me if you have nowhere to go. You don't have to live on the streets."  
  
    Francis thought about it then spoke "What are the other benefits?"  
  
    Arthur asked "What is your request?"  
  
    Francis smiled wrapping his arms around Arthur's neck and pressing his lips against Arthur's, teasing his mouth open with his tongue breathing "You." Before pushing him back onto his back and straddling his hips.  
  



	5. Where Your Loyalties Lie

    As a Hunter it is Alfred's job to hunt down the creatures that may cause harm and chaos to this world. The only problem is, they can send a creature back to it's original realm all they want but no matter what they'll crawl their way back over and over again. The only way to ensure that they'll never return is to completely destroy them and the humans that have ties to their realm. This is the only way this world can be safe. That is his code and his job. It's the very thing he lived for but at that moment he didn't know what to do. He was lost.  
  
    He was confused and hurt and scared as he gazed upon a familiar face. Semi long blonde hair and emerald green eyes. He wore just plain trousers and a white button down shirt. He kneeled on the floor next to the pentagram in his basement. Blood smeared his hands, tears streaming down his face mixing with dirt, sweat and blood. Alfred whispered "Arthur......."  
  
    Arthur wouldn't look up at his little brother. He was afraid to see the sad hurt expression in those usually carefree blue eyes. He stared down at the ground, his skin pressed against the cold grimey floor. He knew what Alfred had to do. It was his job and one of the few things Alfred was serious about. Arthur heard Alfred's feet shift as he commanded "Arthur. Look at me." He didn't know why but he obeyed, reluctantly but he still obeyed.  
  
    Alfred watched as his older brother raised his eyes to meet his. They were sad. His face was dirty and he looked ashamed. Barely able to hold his head up. Alfred asked "Why? Why are you doing this?" He gestured at the pentagram and the candles encircling it. He gestured at the spell books and the enchanted relics and the mirror of realms that hung on the back wall.   
  
    Arthur replied shakily "I can't help it. I can't just forget about it all. It's who i am just like being a Hunter is who you are. Alfred, it's not as bad as you thin-"  
  
    Alfred snapped at his older brother "These things and this stuff that you say defines you is killing people and destroying lives. There is nothing good about it."  
  
    Arthur hung his head, hiding his face from his brother in the dim light of the little dark damp room. He ground his teeth in frustration then yelled "Not all creatures are bad. Not all magic is bad. I've been around longer than you Alfred. I've seen the good they can do. I've seen fairies save lives and the witches you've burned cure the incurable. I've seen Ogres lead villagers back to their path when they stray and the Werewolves you hate so much save Hunters and lead them to safety and aid their hunts. When things got bad in the world the very creatures you detest have helped humanity and have saved countless lives. Don't punish them for the few who are bad."  
  
    Alfred growled "Listen to yourself. You have lost your mind Arthur. You have been brainwashed into believing all is good and nothing is bad. That these things you call friends are a time bomb waiting to explode and kill you. You're being used and you don't even know it. You're blind to the truth."  
  
    Arthur rose to his feet and grabbed Alfred by his shirt collar "You know what. If you hate them so much and you truly believe your own words then do to me as you would do to them. I'm not going to stand by and watch you slaughter my friends based on a stupid nonsensical belief. If they go then so do I."  
  
    Alfred was taken aback by Arthur's words but if he didn't obey his orders he could get into serious trouble and he was ordered to kill the one who was opening doors to other realms in this area. He took the job thinking it would be easy but he never thought his target was Arthur. If he didn't follow through on his orders he could be tortured for it or worse.   
  
    Arthur let go of Alfred and kneeled before him, facing the ground he readied himself for Alfred's judgement. Alfred pulled out him revolver and spun it before locking the cartridge in place. He pointed the barrel at his head. "Iggy........"  
  
    He straightened up sith a shaky sigh. He thought to himself 'I've done this a thousand times to hundreds of different creatures and dark humans. One more shouldn't be a problem so why is it so hard?'  
  
    He started his judgement "Arthur Kirkland, You have failed this world in keeping it pure and free of the hold of Darkness. You are here by found guilty of your shameful acts against this realm and now face judgement. What are you final words and/or requests?"  
  
    Arthur stated "I have no regrets about helping my friends. I just want to say, Alfred F. Jones, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and i'm proud of you. I hope you live a good life and stay strong against all you face. I love you Al."  
  
    Tears trickled down the faces of both men. Alfred didn't care enough to wipe them away as he pulled back the lever and said "With those words said, you have breathed your last breathe and i shall send you to whatever world awaits you on the other side." He made the symbol of the holy cross in the air and spoke a few lines of latin before breathing "Good bye, Iggy. I love you." He trembled with sorrow but it was his job. He had to fullfill every order. His hands shook making it hard to focus on the gun.  
  
    He pulled the trigger, releasing a deafening BANG loose in the quiet room. It echoed, hurting his ears but he didn't care. He dropped to his knees with a sob. Curling up on the ground and letting the old revolver drop to the floor and skitter across the hard stone surface, he cried "I can't do it. I love you Iggy."  
  
  
  



	6. Sweet Dreams

     Ivan laid on the couch, a book held open in his grasp as he read it with great interest. After a while of reading he had almost forgotten that Alfred was sitting next to him watching an afternoon re-run on t.v. He would glance up now and again and see the young american watching boredly with tired eyes, flipping through channels during commercials then returning to the same channel he had started on. Every now and then he'd nod off for a moment then wake and stretch and yawn as if he weren't really tired. A few short shows later, the american's eye's slid shut, surrendering to sleep, his head bobbing down resting his chin against his chest. Ivan was deeply absorbed in his chapter when Alfred's body sagged in a scrunched up slouching position then slowly fell over, uncurling itslef leaving his head resting on Ivan's lap.  
  
    Ivan looked down from his book, greeted by a peaceful sleeping face. With a sigh, he marked his spot in the text, closed the book and placed it on the coffee table in front of them then pulled off Alfred's glasses, making sure they didn't get broken and sitting them next to the book. He stared down at the young man thinking to himself 'He's so cute. It's adorable how childish he looks and he's rarely this quiet.' He placed a hand on the side of his head and gently stroked his blonde hair back. His cowlick bouncing back into place automatically after every stroke.  
  
    Ivan couldn't help but smile. Alfred looked like he was still just a child, sweet, adorable and innocent. He seemed unknowing of the hells of war and the negativity and hatred that plagued the real world but he's seen and experienced it all. He truly was still young, younger than all the other's but he still has seen some pretty dark things and yet he remains so adorable and untouched by it all. He continued to observe him. The gentle rise and fall of his chest. The carelessness of how he slept. The quiet breaths. All so peaceful and beautiful.  
  
    Alfred scrunched up his nose in his sleep in a playful way while moving around just a little bit then settled in place with a smile spreading across his face. He was happy in either world, dream or reality, it didn't matter. Ivan continued to watch Alfred dream, amused by all the different emotions he seemed to express with so little effort and facial change. He didn't notice Alfred had moved his hand to his, wrapping his fingers around his slowly while mumbling something under his breath. Shocked at first but mostly curious, Ivan leaned down closer listening to his words. Alfred mumbled them, making them almost weaker than a whisper. Ivan leaned down closer until he could feel Alfred's breath on his cheek, low and even. He caught the words "I love you." seconds before Alfred raised his head and tilted it ever so slightly, catching Ivan's lips with his own. He kissed him gently as if it were a fragile breath on an early Spring morning. Like it was the first seconds of a new fawns life. The moment was savored and explored. Held tighly yet caressed with a featherly touch. It felt like it was worth everything in the world and yet completely priceless. They parted after a few seconds, inside their hearts, it felt like eternity. They hammered to a lullaby so sweet only known as the other's own heart.  
  
    Alfred reached up and touched Ivan's lips with his fingertips gently, tracing them slowly. Ivan wished to kiss once more but knew that one could never be replicated. And that moment was all theirs and no one else's. Their own sweet memory, light and fluttery like a dream in some far off world. A world that was all their own. Alfred smiled up into Ivan's deep violet eyes. They were sweet and caring even though he knew well all the shadows that lurked deep within. The bad things he's seen but none of that meant anything. The past didn't define them. It never has and never will. Time will never break them apart but pull them closer together. A few seconds alone together felt like a lifetime of happiness.  
  
    Ivan gazed into Alfred's ocean blue eyes as he cradled his head in his lap and smiled. They were so full of life and energy. Ivan realized though that their usual empty sad shadow was gone and for once, Alfred looked the happiest he's ever been. He smiled up at Ivan "I know what you think." He said as he sat up and pulled himself in closer to Ivan, cuddling up next to him.  
  
    Alfred rested his head on Ivan's shoulder as he gave an incredulous smirk "What am i thinking then?"  
  
    Alfred gave a happy tired sigh "That i don't look so sad and miserble anymore, right?"  
  
    Ivan wrapped his arm around Alfred's body, holding him close "Da. You are right.Why the change?"  
  
    Alfred snuggled closer "It's because i have you. I love you Ivan."  
  
    Ivan kissed Alfred's forehead as they laid next to each other huddled close. Ivan wrapping his blanket around them both as he smiled "I love you too Alfred."   
  
    He watched Alfred doze back off to sleep then soon he too nodded off. His usually cold body, warm and inviting in Alfred's presence. He was truly happy now for once in his life all because of Alfred.  
  



	7. Prussia's Entry

Journal Entry-   
Date: XX/XX/XX  
Subject: Lonely Traveller

 

Freak.

Demon.

Monster.

Mistake.

Am i really any of these things? Was i born on this earth just to be a target for threats and insults? Am i really that useless? God, have you forgotten me or have you sent me down here to be your entertainment? What did i do to deserve this? This horrid punishment. My brother is perfect while I'm a mistake. I'm nothing BUT a mistake. I know they're not wrong. Those words they stab me with every day of my life are true. I wish they weren't but every time i look in a mirror, i see the silver haired demon people fear. I see the monster that i masquerade as daily but i can never take the mask off. It is my reality. It is who i am. Believe me, I've tried to change. I've tried to remove the mask but all i did was leave scars that made other's fear me more. I've tried to punish myself if only to please you but you seem to not care. All you did was show someone my tally board that is a permanent decoration along the inside of my right arm. All they did was force useless pills down my throat and throw me into a circle of addicts and bathroom cutters with high hopes of change. All i did was find a new way out. But when i made a break for it, the door was locked and i woke up in an ambulance ride to a white washed hell. I've been tied up and preached to. Locked away and forgotten. Left alone to rot and now, i'm just another shadow lurking along this road, alone in the streets every night. I have nothing left. As if i had something at all before. I had a hateful mother and a nowhere father and a golden brother while i was left to the wind. They looked down upon me and wished i wasn't there. I have run away but they drag me back if only to torment me more with criticism and anger. They lash out and no one cares. I beg for help and forgiveness but my pleas fall upon deaf ears. They look at me with malice and contempt. My brother tries to help but there is only so much a little kid can do. Just as their is only so much i can do. I didn't chose this but i'll sure as hell find the next doorway out of it all. I can promise you that.

-signed  
Gilbert Beilschmidt  
(Prussia)


	8. A Flinching Lonely Heart

     Ivan let out a long quiet sigh as he sat on an old tree stump. The world meeting had ended hours ago but he remained in his favorite spot while everyone else headed home. Light snow drifting down and covering the sunflower he had held tight to his chest not long ago but now it layed on the ground, cold, dead and wilted. Void of any possible life just like Ivan's land. As far as his eyes could see which wasn't much on the account of the coming blizzard, it was an icy wasteland of death. Nothing grew here. Everything just died and froze over, soon to be burried beneath feet of white. Not even the sun peeked through the clouds, it hid away, shrouded in a dreary blanket of thick grey.  
  
    His sad eyes stared down at his gloved hands, he watched as a single snowflake floated down to rest in the center of his hand, soon more flakes fell and joined it, massing together to form as one big snowflake. He let out another sigh, even in this land of cold and death, he is still the loneliest thing to live on this earth. Even the snowflakes gathered together. He watched his breathe melt the flakes away. And even they succumbed to a silent death, unlike himself who could never die.   
  
    He closed his eyes and listened, hearing a light crunching behind him. This caused him to looked up to see familiar warm blue eyes peer out at him from behind a big poofy scarf. 'Alfred?' Ivan asked himself 'What is he doing here?' He watched Alfred shuffle out from behind a tree and approach.  
  
    He looked at the russian intently, his gaze never waining from that sad sight. "Ivan? Why are you all alone out here?" He sat down next to Ivan and stared down at the ground. The sight of the sunflower burried beneath the snow caught his attention. Ivan had been carrying it around all day and hadn't put it down, not even for a second. He kept tight hold of it and now it was turning brown and whithering before him. This shocked and worried him.  
  
    Ivan placed his hand against the stump and glanced at Alfred. Those blue eyes were like the sky in his dreams. A brilliant vibrant blue that soared before an endless sea of golden yellow sunflowers. The colors so bright and vivid. The breeze so warm and gentle, not harsh and sharp, like many icy needles that pierce your skin, leaving it frozen and painful. The days were long and bright leaving him feeling happy and energized. But that was all just a dream.   
  
    Alfred looked into Ivan's sad violet eyes. His heart felt like it was breaking for him. He placed his hand next to him as he leaned a bit closer after removing his scarf, his fingers landing on top of Ivan's hand and wrapping around it. Ivan tensed up and flinched slightly at the touch. He wasn't used to close personal contact, even with gloves on, he could feel Alfred's body heat reaching his cold skin and thawing him.  
  
    Alfred leaned in close "Why do you look so sad, Ivan?"  
  
    Ivan wanted to say something but his breath caught in his throat and his voice seemed to disappear. Alfred sensed this and wished to revive his ability of speech by leaning in and pressing his lips against his. He kissed him with a gentleness that warmed him from within. Ivan felt his face warm and redden with Alfred's touch, he felt like loosing himself in Alfred. Taking his body and making it part of him. He wanted every fiber of Alfred's being to be all his. Alfred pulled away, his lips just hovering before Ivan's mouth, his taste was sweet with a hint of vodka. He looked into Ivan's eyes, a smile dancing on his face before he resumed to part Ivan's mouth open with his tongue. His harmless curiousity pursuaded him to explore further, not risking the thought of loosing this chance. Ivan gave into Alfred's easy coaxing, his seductive movements pulling him into a tight embrace. Warm and ravashing, an addictive feeling swept through him. He was unable to refuse Alfred's active requesting gestures.   
  
    Alfred raised his hand and placed it on Ivan's hip, moving it towards his back to make his grip more stable. This more personal motion snapped Ivan out of his revery. He pulled away from Alfred's embrace and fell back off of the stump. Alfred looked at him, stunned by his actions "Ivan? What....?" Ivan shook his head not daring to make eyes contact. He scrambled to his feet and ran away deeper into the woods. He didn't want Alfred to see him. Not his wavering heart or even his confusion. Truth is, he was afraid. He was afraid of Alfred. Of what he represented. Of what he felt for him. he didn't want Alfred to get so close only to be hurt by Ivan. He didn't want Alfred to end up like everything in this god forsaken country did. He didn't want to lose him and so he ran. Not risking a glance back. Dredding the look of hurt and confusion and pain that would be on Alfred's face. Ivan knew he was terrible. Even so, he continued running. His tracks disappearing as the storm began swirling and transforming into a deadly blizzard.


	9. The Soldier's Surrender - The Call of Honor

 The Soldier would rather die than surrender. Though starved already, surrounded and weak, he still holds his ground. Attacking all who approach with the bayonet at the end of his rifle. It's been a few days since he used the last of his ammunition. He realizes the importance of the walls that surround him, separating him from the enemy. This little shack is his only protection. The enemy smiles and laughed at his futile attempts of defense.  
  
 The pain of starvation ravages his body, leaving him dizzy and shaking uncontrollably. With unsteady hands he fights  
 to traverse this path in which he has chosen. Sleep deprived and ill, he still stands with his head held high and his weapon  
grasped in trembling fingers.  
  
 A sound shifts from behind him, causing him to spin around quickly only to stop in a daze. He blinks his blurry eyes,  
 his gaze hangs upon the sight before him. A young enemy soldier, injured badly by the sight of the wound and the amount of  
blood that covered the ground beneath him. He didn't look like he had much left in him and that he'd be passing soon.  
 The soldier pushed a box towards him with a note attached on top. The soldier smiled before he collapsed to the  
ground, taken by death's embrace.  
  
 The man picked up the note, smudged with blood, he read the scribbled writing:  
  
  _You are an honorable man. You fought for your men and your country with great bravery. Fearlessly,_  
 _you stand in our way, distracting my men so yours could escape. You deserve what is within the_  
 _container I have given you. You are a determined man._  
 _Live long. Fight strong. Stay free._  
 _-Lieutenant Kiku_  
 _(Chuui Kiku)_  
  
 Inside the box was many supplies such as food, water, medicine and ammunition. The soldier loaded his weapon while  
eating a few bites of dried food. He rose, glancing at the note before folding it up and tucking it in his inside  
pocket. He stepped to the shed's window and unleashed a storm of bullets upon his enemies. After he painted the earth  
with the blood of the opposing troops, he slumped to the ground with a tired smile. He looked at the young soldier "Thank you."  
  
.......................................................................................................................  
  
 The young man awoke from his dream, A sheen of sweat covered his skin from the sudden old memory. He hurriedly  
dug into his desk drawer and examined the note from the enemy soldier. He held between his fingers, the blood smears still  
present as he breathed "I can't believe it's been 9 years. Thank you Kiku"


	10. War Hero?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfred begins to question the fact he's a Hero.

      The American soldier sat with his back against a stone wall, taking cover in the shade while he had the chance. His mind wandered to a memory of a few months prior. He remembered it clearly. It was easy to do since it had plagued his dreams ever since the moment he pulled the trigger. A black cloud that shadowed his mind.  
  
     _A sweet young girl with long brown hair and blue eyes walked towards him. She wore a beautiful powder blue sun dress and carried something in her grasp but the man couldn't make out what it was. Her bare feet padded across the dirt sending up puffs of red dust into the air. Gun shots echoed in his ears but he was too amazed by the sight of her as she moved swiftly through the chaos, untouched by bullets like some kind of angel. Angel dropped in the middle of a war zone. His superior yelled at him "Kill all who approach you!" before ducking behind cover._  
  
  
 _The man raised his rifle and aimed, his red dot sight rested on her heart. His finger rested on the trigger, ready to fire his weapon but it wouldn't move. He stared at her with astonishment before hollering to her "Stand down!" She didn't seem to notice so he called out "Do you understand me? Stand down or i will shoot." The girl looked at him, curious as to what he was saying. Her approach quickened slightly making the American worry. He began to panic "I said stand down! I don't want to shoot you. Please, stop walking! Please! I'm begging you, stop! Stand down!" A grenade went off nearby, the explosion made the American flinch which caused him to squeeze the trigger, releasing a bullet into the air seconds before it buried itself inside the girl's chest._  
  
  
 _She fell back, her body crashing to the ground before him. Without another thought, the american was scrambling to her side. Blood soaking into the sand and coloring her dress a sick crimson. He held her head "Why didn't you stop?" his voice trembled. The girl smiled up at the american as she raised her hand to the man's face and wiped away a tear with the corner of a snow white cloth. It took the American a second to realize that the object she held the entire time was a flag of Peace. He gasped, unable to force out words as she cupped his face and place a gentle kiss on his cheek and whispered "Don't cry....." before her eyes fell shut and her breath ceased. She had a faint smile still held on her lips. He never thought the face of death could look so happy and peaceful._  
  
 _The American held the flag in his hands, wringing it between his fingers as a young blonde haired man sat down next to him. He looked almost exactly the same as the American except for a curl that always hung down in his face and his soft violet eyes where as the american had a cowlick and sapphire blue eyes. "You okay Alfred?" his brother asked._  
  
  
    Alfred stared down at the flag, still drifting on the boundary between memories and reality. Alfred felt his brother shake his shoulder "Alfred, what's wrong? You've been acting weird for a while now and i'm starting to worry."  
  
  
    Alfred looked up as if just noticing his brother's appearance for the first time "Hunh? Oh, hey Matty.....um.....sorry."  
  
  
    Matthew looked at his brother with more concern this time, as he repositioned his rifle from his lap to the spot next to him "Alfred?"  
  
  
    Alfred rubbed his eyes "Matty..can i ask you something?"  
  
  
    Matthew was surprised that his brother had to ask such a thing but he went along. At least he wasn't stuck in the weird glazed expression he gets when he's thinking about something serious. "Sure Al."  
  
    Alfred took a moment to sum up what he wanted to say before beginning with "Are you proud of what we do? Our jobs i mean. Are you proud of it?"  
  
  
    Matthew thought for a second then said "Well, yeah i guess i am. Why?"  
  
  
    Alfred looked Matthew in the eyes for a moment then returned his gaze to the flag "Well, everyone back home calls us heros. Do we really deserve that title?"  
  
  
    Matthew was shocked by his brother's question. Alfred wasn't being himself. "What do you mean? Al, your scaring me bro. What's this about?"  
  
  
    Alfred looked at Matty with a sad look and gave a worn sigh "Matthew. We go out and fight a war. It sounds noble and patriotic and all but in reality, what we're doing, it just doesn't add up to me." He gave another sigh, his gaze moving to watch the open expanse of desert before them before continueing "We kill thousands of people in the name of what we believe is right. Sure, we've killed a lot of really bad people but we've also killed a lot of good people. People who are innocent. Who were thrown into this god forsaken war just because they live here and they don't want to lose what they've worked hard for. Their homes. Their family. They fight only to protect what they care for. Then you have the people who fight just because they hate us and want us out of here. All this blood is shed but for what? We seem to be no closer to our goal than when we started. We do so much bad shit without another thought and expect no one to care because this is the enemy but not everyone here is the enemy."  
  
  
    He looked at Matthew "Then we go home and we are celebrated and labelled heros. Yeah, some of us deserve that label. But dude, i don't know. It's  just, back home no one really knows what's going on. We're just a bunch of guys wandering the desert in search of evil but it seems to me, we're doing more harm than good. If you ask me, the true heros are the ones that never have to pull the trigger on an innocent person."  
  
  
    Matthew looked at his bother incredulously "What has gotten into you, Al? Is this about that girl you killed?"  
  
  
    "No!" Alfred blurted defensively then he checked himself before adding "At least not completely. I've thought this for a while. Just never mind. Forget what i said." With that he rose to his feet and grabbed his rifle, then walked away from his brother.  
  
  
    Matthew stood up quickly "Where are you going?"  
  
  
    Alfred didn't look back as he yelled "I'm going for a walk. Alone. I'll catch up with you later." then he added with a whisper " _But no promises on that, Matty._ "  
  



End file.
